Sunday, November 14, 2010

Are you SURE you've got the right address?

We received a lovely red envelope in the mail yesterday.  Well, I say "we". Actually, it was addressed to my husband.  Early on in our thirty-odd year marriage, we established this rule: what's HIS is mine and what's MINE is mine.  So, after I admired the weight of the mystery packet for a split second, I ripped it open.  A card bearing the word Free Gift immediately grabbed my attention.  My inner bargain-hunting beast stirred from it's murky depths, rumbling with a hungry growl. "Free?  We LUVZ free."  Interest captured, I read the rest of the colorful card, then exploded with an unrestrained snort.

"What's so funny?" Hubby asked, peering over my shoulder at HIS mail.

Tapping on the card, I drew his attention to the following statement (direct quote from the card):

"This limited time offer is extended only to a select group of candidates whose lifestyles match our world class community."

"Did you know we had a lifestyle?" I asked as I pushed up the sleeve of my favorite faded sweatshirt currently sporting enough dog hair to build another pet.

Hubby grinned and replied, "I think they'd be a little surprised if we showed up at their establishment."

Now, don't get me wrong.  I consider us extraordinarily wealthy. Our cozy little home brims with character, fairly bursting at the seams with love and laughter.  We each have our own vehicle and more than enough food to satisfy our needs. 

But hubby and I are a down-to-earth, middle-class couple and we've got a rather bad habit of speaking our minds when we're so inclined.  My idea of a rocking good time is sitting in the porch swing in my backyard watching Hubby grill steaks for our family.  Oh --and hot dogs and marshmallows.  Our granddaughter's not too wild about steak. 

Yes. We've traveled a bit --after working overtime to foot the bill and then scheduling vacation from our jobs.  And while I consider us rich beyond measure, I don't think we fit the mailer's definition of "select group of candidates".

When it's all said and done, I believe the MAIN reason we don't fit into this elite group is because we don't want to be a part of their community.  Their aloof statement offended me.  Who are they to judge? 

So, they are welcome to keep their free gift (a set of golf clubs - complete with a bag and yes, Hubby has been known to play cow pasture pool on rare occasions).  Hubby and I choose to pass on this offer.  I think we're going start our own elite community and we're going to let everyone join...even them.  But they have to bring their own hot dogs.


  1. yeah, I know, as I sit here editing, and hubby is channel surfing. I could go hide in another room to concentrate, but I'd miss him. We work hard for everything we have, and it boils down to a little house with too many pets and yes my favorite forest wizard T-shirt has a few holes, but I don't think Rich or the dogs care. (I have others without...just love this one) I would love to join your elite community and I have my own hot dogs!

  2. I'm so happy that you took a stand against the elitist. lol. Here's to those of us that are okay with our lives just the way they are...or for the most part. *smiles*

    Thanks for sharing your stand.

  3. LOL! Welcome to the group, Kate. You don't have to bring your own hot dogs because:

    Only those,
    Who look down their nose,
    Must bring their own fixin's.
    This group belongs to the common man,
    And all the sassy vixens!


  4. Thanks, Rachel! I'm afraid that stuffy phrase on that card just rubbed my fur the wrong way.

  5. One of the free things I know of is the caring of a friend. And Maeve you have that in spades!
    So glad to know a couple that thinks like we do.

    When we get mail for him, he's like well, what is it. Same for me. We have nothing to hide and the only thing we don't do is candy from his Aunt. I have to let him open that...

    Try Free Stuff Times on Yahoo.
    I just got some great samples from Windex, Pledge and a sort of duster from Pledge.

  6. Thanks for the tips, Mary, but most of all, thank you for your friendship. You always brighten my day. :-)

  7. American marketing schemes. Ya gotta love/hate 'em!

  8. You are so right, Pat. I guess they didn't count on the possibility that the statement might be offensive to some.

  9. Great post, Maeve. I'm with you on the elite part..though it would sometimes nice to dress up and go to the fancy parties you see in the paper, I'm just as happy sitting in my easy chair in my sweats!

  10. I'm not too keen on the dressing up part, Anna Kathryn...but I think it would be neat if I could be invisible and go to those parties just to "people watch". Hubby says that would make me a stalker. I told him, "No. That makes me a silent observer." ;-)

  11. Ooh, can I come and bring my doghair?

  12. Come on over, Miriam! LOL! Dog hair AND doggies are welcome too. :-)

  13. I would rather sit around a camp fire with family and close friends. They can keep their 'community.' I'm sure I couldn't keep up with their designer this and that anyway!

  14. Great post, Maeve. I agree. I am not so sure what hubby would do with the golf clubs anyway. He has a set that has seen the local course three times when his boss insisted that he attend the once a year engineers' outing. We are the kick back on the patio types as well. It is a little sad that some people spend their entire lives hoping to get into an exclusive group of some kind. I say the more the merrier. Come on over and pull up a chair. If I run out of places on the patio, I have some bag chairs I can pull out. :-D

  15. LOL! Becca & Victoria - sounds like we're all of one mind. :-)

  16. In a quest to find 'better schools' and 'safer environment for our kids' we found ourselves in a community like you spoke of. We are more like you, and claw at our brick three story pretentious home trying to get out. You see, with every community there are issues, but now we have people who think they are above treating others with respect because they have money. We are beer and cheese people living in a wine and caviar society. Although, I get along with others I cringe and walk away every time the 'bashing' begins. Help!?!? :)