Monday, September 12, 2011

My list of writerly pleasures...

We’ve all seen lists of a writer’s woes:

1.      Rejections.

2.      Writer’s Block.

3.      Grammar Godzilla’s.

4.      Rejections. (Yes. I realize I listed that one twice. It’s a biggie.)

5.      Writing Software FUBAR’s. (In case you’re not familiar with the  acronym – it means: *Effed* Up Beyond All Recognition).

Anyway, you get the idea and if you happen to be a writer, I’m sure you can relate. But due to a very WONDERMOUS email I received a few days ago, I decided to make a list of a few writerly pleasures and the responses they evoke.

  1. Typing “The End”.  Immediate exhale, stretch numbed arms over head while flexing stiff and aching back.
  1. Completing the wicked synopsis, pitch, and query letter for your polished manuscript. Relieved sigh, shut computer down and ransack kitchen in search of chocolate and coffee to replenish dangerously low levels of brain steam. 
  1. Email from targeted editor that just received evil synopsis, pitch and query. Email doesn’t begin with “Although the premise of your story sounds interesting…”  Instead, it contains a short, crisp paragraph requesting a partial. Emit quiet writerly sob of joy. Save several copies of email to folders on hard drive, secondary email address, secondary server and iPhone so there is no danger of losing it and wondering if it was only a dream. 
  1. Email from same editor requesting a full. Same response as Writerly Pleasure #3. However, quiet writerly sob of joy is replaced with blood curdling whoop of HOT DAMN! that launches unsuspecting, napping dog into immediate attack mode and sets him searching for the intruder that caused the scream. 
  1. EMAIL/PHONE CALL OFFERING A CONTRACT. Dry mouth. Rapid heartbeat. Dizziness. If Writerly Pleasure #5 is in fact a phone call, I strongly recommend allowing the recognized number to go to voice mail so that you’re able to speak coherently when talking to your soon-to-be editor. 
  1. Completing edits. Happy, satisfied sigh. Gratitude for an editor who just helped “tweak” your book into an even better story. 
  1. Receiving email with the jpeg file of the proposed cover for your book. Another whoop of joy. Same napping dog reaction as in Writerly Pleasure #4 and same saving of this email as in Writerly Pleasure #3. 
  1. ARC’s (advanced reading copies) Have you ever hugged a book as though it were made of solid gold? 
  1. Holding your just released “baby” in your hands.  Pet the shiny cover. Excitedly lick your lips. Smell the pages. Channel Gollum from Lord of the Rings. “M’prescioussss is sssooo pretty”. 
In reference to Writerly Pleasure #7, look at my lovely cover for ETERNITY’S MARK (scheduled to release in April). Isn’t m’presciousss…I mean…*ahem*…isn’t it gorgeous? 
And I'm sure you couldn't help but notice the gorgeous cover of my upcoming release from The Wild Rose Press, THE HIGHLANDER'S FURY at the beginning of this post. *happy sigh* *deep throaty writer's purr at the sight of both beautiful covers*

If you’re a writer, do you have any writerly pleasures you’d like to share? If you’re a reader, how does a shiny new book affect you? Hmm?